You can break down. No one expects you to always be the indestructible. We may pretend that we are and hide from the world to keep ourselves from being hurt. But when we get home, all masks fall and we’re naked-alone with our thoughts and our true feelings.
Then you know that you can collapse. You know that nobody is watching.You know that no one will see your weakness. You can close the bedroom door and cry and only your own four walls are your audience. You will not tell anyone. They will applaud you quietly and you will get over it.
You can just cry like that. You may feel that you have to cry. You have to get rid of all those misty feelings that bother you. They trigger an unpleasant feeling in you. They are the clouds that blacken your sunny mind.
You are allowed to cry because of your past. You do not necessarily have to get rid of a few things. You have to cry them out of you and then let them go. That will be your salvation. Maybe you did not have the opportunity to complete this chapter of your life. Maybe the time has come for you to process this chapter.
You do not have to be ashamed that you have no one to share your pain with. You have yourself. You can share it with yourself. You’re the one who knows you best. You are the one who knows your heart and your mind best. You can do that.
You do not have to be ashamed to cry and scream in your pillow so no one hears you. It’s okay to wake up on a pillow that’s wet with all those tears.You will wash them off as if you were washing your feelings along with your tears.
You can lie when you say that you are fine. You have to lie because you’re wearing your strong mask. This will help you overcome the day when people just want to crawl and cry in the darkest corner of your room.
You may be alone in the bathroom, staring at the mirror and looking yourself into your bloodshot eyes and trying to calm yourself, because you have to enter a room full of people who will notice that you have been crying. You will wash your face and try to pull yourself together until your face returns to a natural color. And even if some people notice, you’ll lie and say you’re okay. No, you’re great. That you never felt better.
You may collapse in front of another person. This person will try to help you. It’s ok to get help. We all need that. We are all human beings, we all have feelings and we all need help. Just like you. That does not make you a worse person.
You may hide under your mask that you created yourself. You can take it off when you get home.
You may collapse because you will raise yourself again.
It is wonderful that you are in harmony with your body, your heart, your soul and your mind.
You work on it. You will be fine.