The #MeToo debate raises important questions and, more importantly, answers them.
No, it’s not ok if the boss makes sexual advances. No, it’s not ok to invite an employee for a romantic dinner and then home. While at least a part of the men’s world has finally awakened and praised improvement, there is still uncertainty where the limits are set. “Man (n) will probably still be allowed to flirt,” say men.
You are not wrong. In times of #MeToo , a teenager was expelled from school for trying to kiss his equally minor girlfriend on the school trip. The girl did not feel pressured, the reference is absurd. The other side still exists: women still feel ashamed to be ashamed when, for example, a colleague in love does not accept the ‘no’, instead following home for further attempts at approach and the employer fails because he downplayed the situation ,
As a woman, one often asks oneself whether a limit has already been crossed or whether the guy is just not right when he says “do not act like that”. When do the overtures of a man go too far?
If he does not accept a no
It is really easy. Will you go out with me? No. Do you want to go home with me? No. Do you want to sleep with me? No. A kiss is not reciprocated, a hug is quickly resolved. The limits are definitely exceeded when a man does not leave despite a clear answer. That starts with persuasion and in the worst case, it becomes a pressure . “She has joined in” is no longer a valid argument afterwards.
If you feel uncomfortable
Borders can of course be set individually. One woman can smile about a penetrating wink, another pushes the pat on the butt afterwards with a laugh. Anyone who dares to attempt such an approach has a duty to be so sensitized to understand when a woman does not feel well. Sometimes common sense is enough: If a woman has repeatedly expressed her lack of interest in a partnership, salacious love messages that have been personally placed in the mailbox are an unpleasant intrusion into privacy.
When power relations are exploited
It is the most treacherous border. The one that #Me Too has inflamed. And those who are still not always aware of women when they are crossed. This is not only about overtly violent attacks and harassment by supervisors , but also about emotional blackmail, in which above all women have to fear professional disadvantages. In contrast, education and a leadership culture that takes complaints as seriously as borders help.
While at least a part of the men’s world has finally awakened and praised improvement, there is still uncertainty where the limits are set.