You spent years next to someone with a narcissistic personality disorder (NPS). This person has been abusing you emotionally, mentally and maybe even physically and sexually for years.
But the good news is that you finally had the courage to get rid of him. And although that was a big step forward, it’s still like you still feel the effects of what went on for years.
You are still overwhelmed with feelings of hopelessness and helplessness, and still have flashbacks of everything you’ve experienced so far.
Sometimes you feel that you have not moved a centimeter and are still being abused by this man.
If that is the case, it seems that you are suffering from a narcissistic sacrificial syndrome that involves a group of symptoms, and here are 8 of the most common.
1. You question your own reason
One of the things that all NPS sufferers do to their victims is gas lighting.
They want to convince you that the mental abuse is not going to happen, and the best way to do that is to sneak into your head and convince yourself that you are overreacting or imagining things.
Simply put, a narcissist accuses you of being too sensitive and makes you believe that he is actually doing nothing wrong.
But after some time spent as a victim of narcissistic abuse, you begin to manipulate yourself.
You start questioning your own reason and wondering if you really were the one who was wrong all the time.
And not only that – you also convince yourself that some things have not happened, simply because they are too painful for you to digest, so it’s easier to believe your abuser.
2. You feel distanced
Almost all abusive relationships have one thing in common: The abuser does his best to bring his victim into a state of emotional, social, and economic isolation, leading to a sense of distancing.
You just feel that you are not in harmony with your environment or even with yourself.
Your narcissist has isolated you from everyone in order to maintain that power and control relationship between you two.
He knew that if he wants to rule you, he has to make you break the connection to all the people around you so that only he will stay with you.
The sense of distance is the natural response of your brain to everything you go through, and the defense mechanism of your body.
Sometimes the pain is too overwhelming and you just can not stand it anymore, so you become completely numb because you try to run away from your painful reality to preserve your sanity.
You believe that the only way for you to feel no pain is to feel nothing.
3. You put the needs of others before your own
If you have been the victim of narcissism for a while, you get used to putting it first and over time you begin to completely ignore what you want and need.
You’re ready to do whatever it takes to please him, hoping he’ll treat you better. But this behavior does not end the moment you free yourself from this toxic relationship.
Instead, you take that pattern and before you know it, you’re back to putting everyone else’s needs before your own.
The truth is that you have forgotten what it feels like to take care of yourself, and your abuser has managed to convince you that your emotions do not matter.
Remember that it is not selfish to put yourself first and this is the first step you need to take in this path of recovery.
4. You have lost confidence in people
When you first meet a narcissist, you think all your dreams are finally coming true.
But then reality hits you and you see that he is anything but the man you held him for.
Although you initially thought you would have cracked the jackpot with him, he turns out to be your worst nightmare.
After experiencing this, you lose all of your trust in this man and in every other person in your life.
You think that everyone will be like your ex and that all the people around you have only the intention to exploit you and break your heart.
5. You feel that you are never good enough
A narcissist must always feel and think that he is above his victim. And to do that, he does everything in his power to humiliate and convince you that you are good for nothing.
At first you do not believe him, because you know your own value.He wants to convince you that you are not worthy of someone’s love because that is the only way he can keep you around.
But over time, his constant insults go into your head and you really start to think that you’re not pretty enough, not smart enough, not pretty or capable enough.
Unfortunately, this feeling does not disappear together with the abuser.
6. You justify your abuser
I’m sure you’ve heard of the Stockholm syndrome, a condition in which a victim begins to identify with and even sympathizes with his offender.
As you go through some form of abuse, over time, you begin to rely on your abuser, and your brain makes you think that you two have developed a special bond.
And that’s exactly one of the signs of the narcissistic victim syndrome.
You can not explain it, but you are often in the process of justifying your kidnapper and trying to find excuses for his toxic behavior.
You keep telling yourself that he could be emotionally broken and that you could save him.
Sometimes you want to minimize the abuse, to the point that you are the villain of the story and that he is not responsible for everything that is going on.
7. You are depressed and anxious
One of the most common consequences of all types of abuse, including emotional ones, are mental disorders, including severe depression and anxiety.
For years, your abuser did his best to destroy your mind and destroy your will to live.
Remember that the energy of a victim is the food of a narcissist, and he will not give up until he has completely drained you.
Even though he did not manage to completely destroy you, he left you with that bad feeling.
He left you with this inexplicable fear and pessimism. He left you anxious and depressed.
8. You are too careful with people
Your narcissist literally taught you how to behave in order to please him.
You knew he could get upset quickly, and you’ve always worried about doing or saying something “wrong” that could upset him and make you even more abusive.
And you’ve taken that pattern and transferred it to everyone else in your life.
As a result, you go to egg shells near all people and think that a “wrong” move could annoy or drive them away.
If this is something you have caught yourself, one thing is for sure – it’s a sign that you’re suffering from a narcissistic victim syndrome.