If someone asks you if you are emotionally neglected, then you will immediately answer “no.” But if you drill a bit deeper and think about it, then you will inevitably notice that you are actually emotionally neglected either at home, at work, in the circle of your friends, or by your partner emotionally.
Emotional neglect happens when someone fails to meet your emotional needs. This can happen to anyone and most people will not notice it until it’s too late. You will feel that something is wrong. You blame yourself for feeling like you’ve done something wrong, even though that’s not true. Once you realize that you are emotionally neglected and by whom, then you will be able to handle it better and your healing process can begin.
Here are the most common signs that you are emotionally neglected:
1. You sometimes feel numb
This does not refer to a physical numbness, but to an emotional feeling of your thoughts. The whole world is gray, you feel nothing and nothing makes more sense. You are with your loved one, but you do not feel love, you do not feel close to them.
This does not happen often, but when it does, all your feelings disappear. This is a clear indication of emotional neglect and often the cause lies deep in your past. The cause could be your childhood, when you were neglected by your parents or from a previous relationship. Whatever it may be, you have unconsciously learned to suppress your feelings so that you will not be hurt.
2. You often want to be alone
You do not like spending time with other people because they just do not understand you properly. They do not understand how you think and you are tired of explaining yourself and trying to convince others. You feel that you do not belong here and that you may not even want to.
When you are among people, you tend to leave the place or just go out for no reason. You would like someone to understand you, but it’s not easy to connect with you. The reason for this can be an emotional neglect by your social environment. Maybe you’ve heard the phrase “Why is she sitting at our table” and then it all started.
3. You refuse to accept help from others
No matter what difficult situation you are in, you will never ask for help. When you were neglected at home and had to do it all alone, or when your partner was not there for you, when you most needed his help or help, you got used to that pattern and now it seems almost impossible to help others to ask or accept the help of others.
4. You have a low self-esteem
If you are emotionally neglected by your loved one, you constantly feel that you have not earned your time or that you are not important to them. Most of the time this is not true, but you still develop that feeling and it’s hard to get rid of it.
This feeling persecutes you and you translate those feelings to other situations and people in your life. It affects your relationship or your career and the danger is that this feeling will last longer.
5. You feel like something is missing
This constant feeling that something is missing may also have been triggered by emotional neglect. You have the feeling that there is a hole in you that yearns for the love of a certain person. Whoever that person is, he or she has neglected you. Mostly, it happens when you are unhappy with your relationship and your partner does not pay enough attention to you.
You know exactly who that person is because you think that only this person can fill that hole and make you happy. The best advice here is to talk to that person and explain to her why you need her. If the person refuses, then she does not deserve you anyway.
6. You are sensitive to rejection and slightly offended
If you are emotionally neglected, then a constant sense of fear can develop in you. It’s not so out of the blue that you’re always scared of being rejected. You have been rejected in your past. Maybe you could not go to the university you wanted to go to, or you did not perform well in a job interview, or your partner let you sit. No matter what it was, you were rejected, and this fear also manifests itself by feeling offended by the words of others. You even become angry at constructive criticism because you have been emotionally neglected and see this as an attack.
You only really worry about emotional neglect until you understand the implications of it. You can learn how to deal with it, how to heal and how to lead a normal life. First of all, you should not take responsibility because you are trying to change the person who emotionally neglects you. At the end of the day, if necessary, it should be an option to get rid of this person.